Apple Geek Euphoria

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I don’t know how the Apple geeks are going to sleep tonight. The anticipation of Lord Jobs speech tomorrow must be killing them. At long last they will get to watch the high master prancing about on the stage showing off the greatest gadget since William Seward Burroughs invented the adding machine.

Tech geeks aren’t going to have it much better because let’s face it Apple moves markets. They are masters at convincing people you need this gadget and you will feel stupid without it. They should be licensing themselves to start-up companies. I mean if the inventors of the Sham Wow towels had paid Apple to convince the world they needed a miracle towel we would all own one by now.

Apple likes to leak little bits of information to stir the tizzy into a full fledged frenzy but truthfully everyone is still guessing what Lord Jobs will introduce. I mean for all we know he is going to come out on stage and say, “Gotcha! I have nothing, but thanks for showing.” If Apple ever schedules one of these media events for April 1st, I am going to be suspicious.

It won’t happen that way of course. He will come out with some grand statements. They will play music. The crowd will “ooh” and “ahh”. All the tech geeks of the world who are not cool enough to get into the event will be glued to their computers waiting for the play by play from all the different live bloggers. Switching back and forth frantically trying to find the updates which are most current. Gasping, as Apple reveals they have invented a time machine and Lord Jobs is leaving us. Screaming, “I want one!” as he disappears from the stage.

Alright, it probably won’t be a time machine but I guarantee moments after the presentation the tech world will be lit up with Apple lovers and haters arguing the various points of the presentation. Somebody will predict it will never sell (and probably will be wrong) and the world will unsurprisingly not come to an end. Six months from now we will be at it again as Lord Jobs introduces the new greatest invention that has ever existed.

Only a few more hours until Apple unveils the tablet and whatever else they choose to spring on us. Calm yourselves Apple geeks and think happy thoughts while trying to get to sleep tonight. Soon you will be able to claim superiority over the entire technology world again. In the mean time count some sheep, drink some warm milk or do what I am going to do- pop a couple of Ambiens (those things knock you the hell out).

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About csdaley

C.S. Daley was born in California but has spent most of his life in his imagination. His first short story written in third grade, the now classic "Close Encounters of the Turd Kind," was sold to his next door neighbor for a quarter. The neighbor promptly demanded a refund. An unhealthy obsession with the writings of Neil Gaiman, Christopher Moore, and Terry Pratchett have left his mind warped and broken. He spends most of his evening swilling down coffee while tapping at a keyboard under the watchful eyes of his kittens. They are there to make sure he doesn't snap. He likes to write fantasy for adults and teens.

3 Responses to “Apple Geek Euphoria”

  1. >Everyone told me to get an apple laptop..but I got my pc anyway, and I still love it. Actually, windows 7 seems to be working very apple-like (judging from my prior usage of roomie's macbookpro or whatever it is he has). I think that we really don’t need the cute apple things that come out, we just want to need them. Altho I do love my ipod…I need a new one soon… lol.

  2. >Awesome post! Love "Lord Jobs"!!! As you know we are complete Apple junkies…so my hubby just might have to look into some type of sleep inducing technique tonight!

  3. >I'm a Mac fan. Always will be after having my Macbook. My hubby has a PC from work. He's jealous of mine. 🙂 Windows 7 may be set up to look like the Mac software, but it's just mainly cosmetic. Hey, thought I'd start the debate early… 😀

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