Honky Please!


I can almost hear the dropped blog followers before this sentence is even finished. I mean I used the racial slur honky, surely I am malignantly evil. Of course, the fact that it was a non-honky former student of mine who used to say this to me because he knew it cracked me up probably just makes it worse. What kind of teacher would allow such language?

I know how powerful words are. As a teacher and a writer the written word is a big part of my life. It is definitely up near the top of my pyramid of joy. I know words can scar, and entertain, and bring joy, and any other multitude of emotions. Believe me when I tell you I take my words seriously. Which is why when I stumbled across the story about some fool deciding Mark Twain’s Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn classics needed to be censored I nearly self-combusted on the spot.

Apparently, not enough people are reading the book because it uses a certain nasty racial slur which starts with the letter Q. Okay, it really starts with N but I didn’t think you needed me to tell you that. I have faith in my readers ability to think and comprehend. They have decided to replace said N word with the word slave. Not wanting to leave Native American’s out they are changing Injun to Indian.

It’s ridiculous. History is what it is. We can’t change it and make it pretty. It wasn’t a pretty time. Mark Twain used those words because he was staying true to the time. He was trying to make a point with those two books. He thought it out and like the great author he was he chose his words carefully knowing the power they carry. Changing the words, changes the power of the story. It changes the discussion. It changes what Mark Twain intended without his consent or permission (I admit to jumping to the bold conclusion that this decision was made without a consultation with Twain’s ghost. I don’t believe in ghosts but I am fairly certain that if they did consult with Twain’s ghost about changing his story he would have had some choice new words for this publisher).

Although, now that I think about it maybe the publisher has the right idea. I mean some words are totally useless. We should just be allowed to change them. I think from now on all forms of the word “come” should henceforth be known as “blow”. I mean think about it, blow is a much better word. It has power. You get a sense of strength.

I mean blow on. Who wouldn’t like the book Something Wicked This Way Blows or how about the song Blow Together. Norah Jones’ album, Blow Away With Me would have still been a big hit. Plus, sex is a whole lot more interesting if you start shouting, “I’m blowing, I’m blowing!” I bet you can blow up with some of your own examples. I will fuck you to it (I decided I didn’t like the word “leave” either and since I hadn’t sworn in this blog, well, you do the math).

About csdaley

C.S. Daley was born in California but has spent most of his life in his imagination. His first short story written in third grade, the now classic "Close Encounters of the Turd Kind," was sold to his next door neighbor for a quarter. The neighbor promptly demanded a refund. An unhealthy obsession with the writings of Neil Gaiman, Christopher Moore, and Terry Pratchett have left his mind warped and broken. He spends most of his evening swilling down coffee while tapping at a keyboard under the watchful eyes of his kittens. They are there to make sure he doesn't snap. He likes to write fantasy for adults and teens.

2 Responses to “Honky Please!”

  1. >Okay, that was an awesome post! lol

  2. >Fuck it to you to blow up with a good point about changing words in historical novels!Samuel Clemens would be livid about mucking about with his work!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: